Coming right along...

Well, I have been very busy painting...all of the bedroom swapping projects are coming right along...

As is the adoption! Our homestudy is finally complete! It felt like that took forever... We are now just waiting for our final stack of paperwork for the dossier. It seems like things are happening very slowly compared to when we were in the process with Emma. But it's moving along anyway, so I guess that's good.



I was reading this letter that Erin, a woman who I truly admire, wrote. She is my age and has 11... yes, 11 children! (Don't worry Bruce, I admire her, but I know I could not handle 11!) The remarkable thing about her is not only that she has 11 children, but she is a wonderful mother. You can just tell by the way she writes about them, how great the love she has for each one of them...individually...Whenever I read about her I am in constant awe. Her blog is private, but she gave permission to share this letter. I thought it was beautiful...and couldn't resist posting it.

Kids and Moms (and Dads)

I have been thinking a lot about kids lately... kids who don't have moms (and dads)... kids waiting for moms, and what life is like for kids who do not have parents. I have been thinking about the transformation that occurs when a child realizes he has a mom, a dad, a family...security, love and somewhere to belong.

With some of our kids, that "realization" that they have a Mom and a family, that they have someone to belong to, someone to watch over them, someone to care for them and someone to love them, has been gradual. With some of our kids, there has been this "a ha!" moment, where you could just see that they "got it".

There was baby Maggie... almost four months old... laying on the bed in our hotel in Vietnam on our first full day together (I had been visiting her for days at the hospital before this point). Before her hospitalization she had lived in a government orphanage where the babies had their names written on their legs in black magic marker so they could be told apart, and got very very little personal attention. She didn't cry when she was hungry or when she wanted something. She was quiet and tiny, but I could tell she loved being held and loved the attention I was giving her.

I walked away from the bed where she was laying to get a bottle for her, and she made this teeny tiny pitiful (feeble attempt at a) cry, and I rushed over and picked her up and offered her the bottle. She got this look of amazement on her face with a little smile that seemed to say, "Holy cow! You mean that crying thing WORKS with you??" and after that she did not want anyone but me and always wanted me close. She got it. I was there for her. I was her mom.

With Mercy, she was nine years old. She had had a mom before, who did not value or respect her role as a mom. Mercy knew neglect and abuse and loss. Despite that, she came to us with an open heart and a surprising amount of trust. At one point during our first week, Des needed her hair washed (and Mercy had been the one to care for Des up until that point, even though she was only three years older). Mercy told Des to go into the bathroom so she could wash her hair, and I gently told Mercy that I could wash Des's hair, and reminded her that that was the kind of thing a Mom should do. The social worker had warned us that "letting go" of being the caregiver of Des might be hard for Mercy and we might have some power struggles over it... but Mercy looked at me and looked at Des and looked back at me and said, "You wash all the other little kids... You would wash Des's hair too?" and I said, "Yes". And she said, "And then what would I do?" and I said, "Well, you could go play." And she looked at Des again and then back at me, and then she got this huge smile on her face, and you could almost SEE her letting go of the responsibility of caring for her little sister. She ran over and gave me a hug, and then took off to play. She got it. I was there for her and for her sister. I was their mom.

With Solomon, that moment came when we left AHOPE for the second time together. We had spent two days together, and then we had gone back to AHOPE to visit. As we walked through the gate and the kids called out his name and came running to say hi to him, he sat in my arms with huge, silent tears running down his cheeks. He would not make eye contact with anyone (including me, the kids and the nannies) and just stared ahead with this heartbreaking acceptance of the fact that he thought he was being left. Again. It hurt me so much that he had come to accept this from life... that nice people came and went, but he did not truly belong to any of them. I couldn't imagine how his little heart felt and how he had endured all that he had already. I comforted him and held him close and told him over and over again in his ear that I would never, never, never leave him.

He started to relax a little the longer we were there and I stayed with him, but he was not his usual self. And then it happened. I put him in the sling, we waved good-bye, went back out through the gate and headed back up the road towards the hotel for some lunch. He got this HUGE grin on his face, and was bouncing up and down in the sling laughing, and then grabbing my face and kissing it over and over as we walked. He was so happy and joyful. He got it. He was not going to be left again. I was HIS. He was mine. I was his Mom.

Since then I have watched him blossom with love. I have watched him learn how to expect and look forward to being held often, comforted when he cries, rocked to sleep, having his needs met, getting individual attention and being smothered in hugs and kisses often. As I crawled into bed last night, a few hours after I had put him down to sleep, his little body turned towards me, and without waking up, he put his arm on me, snuggled in close and let out a content sigh.

All kids deserve that knowledge, that peace and that comfort. All kids deserve to know that they are loved and that they belong to someone.

I believe with all my heart that our Heavenly Father did not send us down here to go at life alone, to worry about ourselves and to focus our lives on material and trivial things. I believe with all my heart that we are meant to live in families... mothers, fathers and children together, focusing our lives on loving, enjoying and serving each other.

We have several reasons to believe that Solomon most likely spent very little (if any) time with his first mother. And yet even after multiple changes in caregivers and "homes", multiple losses and lots of suffering without a mom to comfort him, he KNEW what a Mom was for from our very first days together. His heart and soul reached out to mine and grabbed on firmly. He knew that he wanted a mom. He knew that hugs, kisses and rock-a-byes were something he wanted, deserved and needed. The other kids we met in Ethiopia knew it too. They knew that they belonged with parents. They knew that something big was missing from their lives.

My heart rejoices for my kids and others that have had their lives changed so drastically...who were once alone, and now live with love, security and family. Watching Solomon over the past few weeks has reminded me of what an incredible miracle adoption is.

And at the same time, my heart aches for the so very many kids who are living life alone right now. . Even the very best orphanage is no comparison to a home and family. It is wrong that these kids must wait and yearn for a family. They deserve, as all children do, the peace and security that comes with the knowledge of knowing that they belong to someone, that they are being cared for and that they are loved.

This is why I support adoption...because I have seen the sadness in the eyes of the children who wait for moms, I have seen the amazing transformation in children once they have been "claimed" and loved, and because I believe, with all my heart, that that love and belonging is what our lives on this Earth are supposed to be about.

What made me cry today....

A few weeks ago, I sent out an email to my family and some close friends. I was asking for help gathering donations for AHOPE I really anticipated that I would get a good response....I know some pretty great people!

But in the weeks that followed, I began feeling very sad and a little hurt that few people even mentioned anything about the email....



Something about me....when I feel hurt, I pull away.




I even went as far as to opt not to go to my sister's house for Easter...(a decision I regret) because I felt like, by my own family not getting what this meant to me...it was a direct insult to me and the things I find important...

Which obviously isn't the case. My family is wonderful, and has always been very supportive....

But I tend to live by my heart...not by my head, so as a result it takes me awhile to make sense of the simplest things sometimes....It's really difficult for me to understand why everyone doesn't see things just the way I do...another real flaw of mine.


Anyway, just today, I got the cutest card from my 11 year old niece Abby...with $10 of her own money to donate for supplies...That made me cry!

While the cat's away, the mouse will....paint?

Anyone who knows me, knows that I have a serious obsession with painting...not of pictures, but actual rooms. I try to mask this strange addiction as "home repair" but really I just need to paint!

So this week, while Jud was out of town, I started....for now just a few walls in the kids playroom downstairs...but while I was painting, the wheels in my head were turning....and I must be reading too many kids books because I started to sound like a Laura Numeroff book! You know like,.... If you Give a Mouse a Cookie... sorry, if you don't have kids, you most likely won't get this!

Here's how it started...

The boys have been sleeping in the guest room for the past two weeks, they are scared in their room and the guest room is much closer to our room (they've been sleeping awesome in there!)....so...if I move the boys room back into the guest room...

then I could move Caroline into the boys current room....

and if I move Caroline into the boys room, then I could move Emma into the room that Caroline is in.

and if I move Emma into Caroline's room, that would mean I could turn Emma's room into the new "nursery"....all rooms of course would need to be re-painted!

Did I mention I'm nesting? And I'm slightly obsessive?

Poor Jud!

Ahhh...Spring!

This is what the first day of spring looks like from my kitchen window!



















And this is the foot of snow out side of my garage door!















And this is my driveway...covered in snow, because I refuse to snowblow anymore this year...!

My first video montage!

Here are a few pictures from Emma's birthday party last weekend! The theme was princesses of course! It was Emma's friend Dottie's birthday too! (She the princess Belle with long blonde hair!) I think all of the girls had a good time! There was make up, nail polish, beads, glitter, paint.. Oh my!!! And of course the Areil cupcakes! YUMMY!

This was a girls only party! The boys didn't mind, they went to see, Horton Hears a Who, with Daddy! Caroline was a great big sister and wanted to stay home to help with all the little girls! And the little girls sure loved her!


Mom and Rhona, all you need to do is push the green arrow!

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Watch This!

This is a video made by the ethiopian triplets mom! I read her blog, she's very funny....I just rewatched this video for about the 100th time and I thought some of you might like to see it!

Rhona I know you'll love it!

This was the first picture we ever saw of Emma! The first time we saw her beautiful face...


With Caroline, Jack and Sam, we have this tradition...starting the night before their birthday, talking with them about what was happening that night just before they were born....and then telling them (age appropriate of course!) about the day that they were born.

I tell them who was in the room, what I was feeling, and of course what our reaction was when we saw them for the first time.

Well, this year, especially with our string of January birthdays...I have started to wonder...what about Emma's birth story?

Is this a tradition that maybe we need to let go...because obviously I don't know Emma's birth story?

So after a lot..and a lot..and lot more thought, I have decided that each one of our kids' birth story is unique....and that's why they love to hear it!

So just because I don't know the exact time, place... or heck, even day that Emma was born, I do remember the anticipation...the waiting...the longing, to meet her... much like I felt while I was pregnant with the other kids.

I remember... while we were in the process, and waiting for Emma's referral, wondering, was there a woman out there, on the other side of the earth, carrying my child...?

Every night when I went to bed, my head was filled of thoughts of her...who was she? what was she feeling? was she hungry? was she scared? did she have heartburn?.... Did she know, that there was another mother out there, longing to love her child?

I so wished that I could reach out to her....to let her know it was ok and this child was going to be loved and well taken care of....

I remember the feelings I felt the first time I saw Emma's picture, and the first time I saw her and held her in my arms....the first time I smelled her smell!

This is her birth story....This is what we know.

This was her birth into our family.

So from now on...on this day, not only will we celebrate Emma's birth, but we will celebrate her birth family...to whom we are forever indebted!

We will never forget...how Emma came into our family...and just how blessed we are...

Happy Birthday Emma!

Since today is Emma's third birthday, let's watch the slideshow one more time!!! I hope no one minds!!!


And here are a few more recent ones! I tend to go a little overboard, I know, but the girl is just too darn photogenic!
















Emma's first visit to the beauty salon!

















Emma needed a little help from big sister Caroline this morning at breakfast to hold up three fingers! It was quite tricky at first, but she has the hang of it now!

This is sure to make you smile!

I'm not exactly sure why, but I've been in kind of a little funk lately....Just a lot on my mind I guess...and then of course the sick kids...for two weeks! (all better now thank goodness!) that's enough to wear any mom down! Anyway, I've been trying to shake it, then suddenly tonight, one look at this little ham....I think I'm cured!























Here's a few from storytime tonight!

Look what I found in my bed!

I just went upstairs to make my bed and look what I discovered! Three kids, snug as a couple of bugs in a rug!
















And just to be fair here is one of Emma this morning with a block of cheese she stole from the refrigerator! (she sure does love cheese!)

We're making progress!

Today I feel like we are finally making progress on the adoption front! This morning I sent out our I600-A to our local immigration office, along with a hefty check, Ouch!! There goes that new camara I had my eye on! We also have completed the first stack of our dossier paperwork! That's a big sigh of relief!

Now, after our agency in MN recieves our homestudy from our local agency (which hopefully is next week,) they will send us the second stack of paperwork for the dossier! Yeah! Then, once that's all done, then we can official start the really difficult part, the wait!

I'm not looking forward to that! I already am feeling the need to nest! I am constantly looking around the house thinking "what else can I paint!" Luckily for me... the kids have all been sick for the last two weeks, so that has kept me very busy and has kept my mind from wandering too much! (yeah right!)

Actually, I shouldn't say all of the kids, because of course fiesty little Em, nothing gets her to slow down! As the other three have been content resting, watching movies, and reading books little Em is running circles around them! She cracks me up! Not to worry, I think we are finally on the mend. Caroline and Jack are both back at school today and Sam will go back tomorrow! Ahhh....peace....well sort of It'll be just me and Em!

Our first INJERA!

This weekend Emma and I sampled our first Injera! The two of us, and another wonderful local family (who are going very soon to bring home their gorgeous little boy from Ethiopia!) went to an Ethiopian Restaurant that just opened downtown.

We had Injera, which is the bread of Ethiopia. (it's not much like american bread...especially the texture, Emma kept saying "look it's squishy!") The injera is meant to be a sort of "table cloth" and then the meal is served over top. You break off a piece of Injera and then scoop up the food, there are no utensils involved! Which Emma thought was very cool!

We had Iab (homemade cottage cheese), Doro Wat (chicken stew with hard boiled egg), Sega Wat (Lamb dices), I think a type of vegetable stew and something else very delicious and spicy but I have no idea what it was called or what was in it! -Patrick do you remember?

I was very interested to see if Emma liked the cuisine. Which she did indeed. (when she wasn't busy exploring the social scene!) She especially liked the Iab, which is a homemade cottage cheese....(I'm not sure if this is an Ethiopian taste she inherited or if it's growing up in Wisconsin!) She has recently also expressed a liking for coffee, (bunna in Amharic) which is typically served to children in Ethiopia...

She has gotten to the point where she steals sips, whenever I'm not looking. I have to admit, seeing these little tid-bits, these tiny little links to Emma's Ethiopian Heritage, become apparent.....it make me feel joyous, and wanting to know more....

All in all... the restaurant was great...the dinner was delicious...and the company was awesome!

I look forward to going back! Only, next time, maybe Emma and I will both know a few Amharic words!

Something to think about....

These are two of my favorite quotes from Melissa Fay Greene's book...they have been running through my head over and over this past week....

"So how does it happen that----while most people instinctively try to save themselves and their families from a catastrophe----a few slow down, look back, and suddenly reach out to stragers? Instead of fleeing in the opposite direction, a few wade into the rising waters to try to yank the drowning onto higher land".....

"----just as there is no blood test to identify who will jump into the fray---there is no simple biographical arc either. No Resume can predict why this man or woman, at a safe remove from crisis, suddenly announces,'this is my fight.' "

This weekend we had a wonderful family that we met through temple, over for dinner, Neil and Adria Willenson and their two gorgeous children. Neil is the founder of Camp Heartland, which is a national non-profit organization dedicated to improving the lives of children, youth and their families facing HIV/AIDS, poverty, grief and other significant life challenges.

The thing that struck me was , Neil was a 22 year old college student when he started this camp.

Here is his story...(this is from their website Camp Heartland.org )

In 1991, Neil Willenson, a native of Mequon, Wisconsin, was 20 years old and a senior at the University of Wisconsin- Madison. He was majoring in TV/Film and, upon graduation, had plans to seek a career as a feature film producer in Hollywood. All that changed, however, when Neil read the headline in his hometown newspaper: "AIDS hysteria in Mequon." A young boy with AIDS named Nile Sandeen was entering kindergarten in the small town of Mequon, and the community was up in arms. Fear and prejudice filled the air. At the center of all this controversy was a five-year-old boy who only wanted to go to school, who only wanted a chance to make friends.

When Neil read this story in his hometown paper, he knew he had to get involved. For the next two years, Neil got to know Nile. He got to know Nile's brother, Sean, and his mother, Dawn Wolff; an entire family affected by AIDS in the center of America's heartland. Neil compared his own life-history in Mequon to Nile's. On the sidewalks, streets and in the schools of Mequon, where Neil had found joy and friendship, Nile had found only isolation and despair. Fear, ignorance and prejudice had turned what had been a heartland for Neil Willenson into a wasteland for Nile Sandeen.

In 1993, Nile turned seven years old. Like millions of other children, more than anything, he wanted to go to summer camp. He wanted to run; to play in the sun with kids his own age. He wanted to sit around a campfire at the end of a day filled with fun activities and sing silly summer camp songs in the dancing firelight - to eat breakfast in a dining hall ringing with joy and activities.

And so in 1993, inspired by Nile Sandeen, Neil Willenson founded Camp Heartland - a summer camp program that accepted both children infected with AIDS and children who were affected by the disease. The camp was equipped with state-of-the-art medical facilities able to handle the special needs of immuno-compromised campers. It was a summer camping program where children living with HIV/AIDS could step out of the shadows of secrecy into the light of openness and honesty - a place where they could have the best week of their lives.

Neil, at a safe remove from crisis, instead of fleaing in the opposite direction, jumped into the fray, and pronounced that this was his fight...

I have been so inspired by Neil... he has given me a lot to think about....

A Funny thing happened the other day...

As I was waiting in this tiny little room while Caroline and Jack had piano lessons... I felt myself relax!

In part because usually I have all the kids with and the task of keeping everyone quiet and entertained in this tiny little room leaves me exhausted and sweaty! However this particular Tuesday Jud was home from work a little early, which meant I could go alone!

So, as I sat and enjoyed my hour of quiet, I noticed the woman sitting across from me. After watching her fidget with her phone, her bracelet, her boots...I noticed, hey! I used to have those boots! I wonder what ever happened to those...Then I suddenly realized, this woman sitting across from me, was me a few years ago.

She was pretty, not gorgeous, but pretty. Her hair was beautiful, her makeup was flawless, her nails were perfect and her jewelry sparkled so much I almost had to squint! Ok so maybe she wasn't exactly me, but there were similarities!

Anyway, it got me thinking about how much motherhood has changed me in the last three years!

Three years ago, I rarely left the house without doing my hair and makeup, even just to go to story time.... these days a hat is just fine! and it's a good day if I get a shower!

My once manicured nails are so pathetic and haven't been painted since Emma wanted me to match her hot pink polish she was wearing one day, the remains are still there...

I have two pieces of jewelry that I wear everyday and they are so filthy that the sparkle is lost.

I used to plan out what everyone was wearing each day, because like a complete whacko I liked everyone to coordinate! That one makes me laugh! Because these days it's a battle just to get Sam to wear pants! (one day he refused so I had to take him to Mayfair Mall in his Captain Hook costume)...

Wherever we went, we all looked nice, and put together. Who did I think was watching us? And even if people were watching, why did I care?

A few weeks ago, I literally looked in the mirror and started laughing! Jud came in and asked what I was laughing at...I said "me! look at me, I'm such a mom! turtleneck, short hair, no makeup, what's happened!"

So, this is the part where I start to relax... That whole phony front, looking like you have everything together, when maybe... just maybe... you don't, I'm over it!

I don't notice people watching us, (although, I do hear their often stupid comments..but that's another story) and I'm not worried about what other people think anymore....

I have started to be more honest with myself about what things really matter, and I have never felt happier and more content with myself and my life. I think for the first time in a long time I really feel like myself...and I'm happy with the person that I'm becoming... afterall, I have a husband who digs the mom look, and four fabulous kids, why should it matter that I haven't showered today!

I guess one day, if we ever find a sitter again, I can wear my boots out for dinner!

Jackson!

Well, I've been informed that there is one thing that this blog is lacking...some pictures of Jack! So here you go Grandpa, this post is for you!

This week I was at the kid's school, helping out in Caroline's classroom, so before I left I thought I'd quick stop in Jack's classroom to say HI...as I was walking down the hall, a woman stopped me. Turns out she is the school substitute. She asked if I was Jackson's mom....(for those of you who haven't heard, when he started kindergarten Jack decided he wanted to be called Jackson!) I said yes, and then she began to gush about what a wonderful little boy Jackson is. She had been in his classroom helping out the day before, and was very impressed with what a great listener and helper he was! This was a moment I think every mom dreams about...having someone (other than maybe your in-laws) recognize what wonderful little people your kids are!

Jud and I were talking about Jack awhile back, about how much he is like a little Jud! I see so much of Jud in Jack. He is so sensitive and caring...yet very rambunctious and athletic! Just like his dad right? And of course he is obsessed with the Badgers! Now where else would he get that from? Anyway I had jokingly mentioned that maybe we should have named him Judson Jr. (something we had in fact thought about) Well, Jack heard that and was so bummed. He really wanted to be a little Jud! Later he told me that someday when he was a daddy, he would have a little boy and his name was going to be Jud! Can you tell he idolizes his dad?

My little brag!

Our Beautiful Little Girl! Can you believe she is almost three?




Well, thank's to Mrs. Baker, I have figured out how to put together a slide show! Oh now your all in trouble! There's nothing I love more in the whole wide world than bragging about my kids!

This one however is all about Emma! I know, what a horrible mother singling out only one child... believe me, I'll make it up later!

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about the whole process of Emma coming home, (I'm sure in a way, to prepare myself for round two) and how this one little girl, this gorgeous perfect little girl changed our family forever! Watching her grow these past two years has felt like we were raising a baby in fast forward. She came home a tiny little peanut who didn't move and days later was rolling over, then sitting up, crawling, laughing, talking , walking...running...and has not stopped yet! Everyday she continues to amaze me!


__________________________________________________

Friday, Feb.15

Ok, I'm adding this here because I am so proud of the new slideshow and I don't want it to move down...but I wanted to share some very exciting news ...Today, Sam and Emma and I attended our first Obama rally! It was awesome! Right before he came out Emma was yelling "Where's Obama?" Everyone around us was cracking up! Then throughout the speech whenever anyone started to chant "yes we can" Emma yelled it out as loud as she could right along with the crowd! Brainwashing? No, I'd like to think that at the age of 2 she's already a really great judge of character!

It was so exciting to be there, of course in large part to see Obama in person and to hear him speak, but also to witness the reactions of the several hundred people there. It was very touching, (and a little funny) how most of the people standing around me, thought that Obama was talking directly to them! They went on answering every question he posed, and affirming every comment he made! At one point I turned to the woman behind me, thinking she was talking to me, but nope, she was talking to Barack! It was a true sign of how so many people, from so many different backrounds find him and his message both relatable and inspiring!

A little update!

This week has definately been a crazy one! We had our social worker come to our house yesterday for our in home "interview"...the last step before she can put together all of the information for our actual homestudy. She thought it would take her a few weeks to get everything in order, meanwhile Jud and I have the next stack of paperwork to get moving on...the dossier! whew! that's a load of fun!

So, anyone who knows me, knows that I am quite the... oh let's see, how should I put it...anal retentive clean freak! yup that's me! So, with a social worker coming into our house I, in true form went a little nuts! I cleaned and scrubbed, washed and folded, even organized closets! So to my surprise, in the midst of my craziness, my sweet dear little angel Emma, (who has been potty trained for about three months) decides this is the day she wants to pee in the middle of the kitchen floor! Wonderful! We had a little talk about why we don't go potty on the floor, which of course she and Sam thought was hillarious! Then, just a short while later, while I was vacuuming the stairs, I noticed a bad smell....I knew just what it was and who had done it!!! I walked into Emma's room to find that she had gotten a pull-up (normally used for bedtime) out of her closet, pooped in it, and then was trying to get rid of the evidence! The used pull-up was balled up in her closet, there where wipes everywhere, and poop all over her rug! Fabulous! We had another discussion about why we don't go poopy in the pull-ups and try to hide it from mommy! This time even Sam was disgusted! It was a learning experience for all! Emma learned how to get mommy's attention, and mommy learned that perhaps it is not wise to take her eyes off of Emma! And Sam, well he learned that he is not the only one in this family who likes yucky things!

Yes, we can!

I love this video! Jud laughs at me because I listen to it over and over! Watching Obama speak, I can't help but feel like I am witnessing something great and powerful.

There Is No Me Without You!

A few months ago, Rhona, Jud's mom, asked me if I had heard of this book by Melissa Fay Greene. I said that I had, but I hadn't read it yet...Honestly I think I was avoiding reading it. A couple days later the book arrived in the mail. (Thanks Rhona!)

I kept the book on my nightstand for a few weeks, I could feel it staring at me, so I moved it to the coffee table. At last one day about two weeks ago, I finally picked it up and began to read, and read, and read. It was so hard to put down, everytime I had a free minute I'd quick try to get in another chapter. I felt so many emotions while reading the story of Heregewoin Teferra, I felt deep sadness, frustration and anger...I don't remember the last time I cried so hard.

The reason I kept putting off reading the book, was because I had heard so much about it and knowing the nature of the story and knowing myself the way I do, I knew it was going to be difficult to read. I think I feared that the book was going to require me to stand up and make changes in my own life and my own way of thinking.

You know when you're driving in your car and you see an accident, and you think how lucky you were that you didn't leave two minutes earlier, or you could have been the car in the accident? That knot in the stomache is what I felt while I read about the children born in Ethiopia, near Addis Ababa. Over and over I kept thinking, that could've been Emma...I could feel myself changing inside as I read these stories.

I have started looking into organizations commited to bettering the lives of these children who have become orphans because of this devastating disease. I'm not sure exactly how yet but I do belive that this is my fight...

Below is some information from Melissa Fay Greene's website where she mentions specific organizations, there is a link on the right hand side I encourage everyone to check it out.

Life in the shadow of the HIV/AIDS pandemic is brutally difficult for parents and children.

Orphaned healthy children are far less likely to attend school, even to grow up: the mortality rate of children under five spikes when their parents are gone.

Children actually infected with the HIV/AIDS virus will die by the age of two; a small percentage of survivors may live to be ten; but, without medicine, their brief lives are full of suffering.

Fewer than ten percent of adult African HIV/AIDS sufferers -- and an even smaller percentage of children -- have access to the expensive and complicated life-saving medicines.


But, there is hope.

A variety of organizations are importing the miraculous drugs into Africa, helping to build health-care institutions, and saving lives.

Other organizations are nurturing and raising orphaned children; some even facilitate adoptions of HIV-positive orphans to America.

Still other organizations help destitute people find decent work.

We actually made it!

Last night was the first time in our family's history that we made it through an entire length of Shabbot Services! Jud and I were amazed at how well all four of the kids did! Caroline sang with her sunday school class, she looked so grown up standing up there, and she was so proud of herself! She kept waiving at Emma who was very jealous that she was not up in the front with her.

On the ride home Jud and I were just giddy with the thought that we are finally getting to the point where we can take the beasts out in public again! We have recently been going out for dinner as a family (to actual restaurants rather than McDonald's) again and each time we just beam with pride at how well behaved they are! Then we reminded ourselves not to get too comfortable because just as we get ready to turn this corner we are preparing to add another one (or two!) and start the whole thing over again!